A Mother and Her Son
In March 1865, the son of Mr. C., a businessman in a small town near Paris, came home dangerously ill. Feeling that he was about to die, the young man, only twenty-one, called his mother close and found the strength to kiss her one last time. Through tears, she answered, "Go on ahead, my son; I won't be far behind you!" He died moments later. When the family went looking for her, they found that she had hanged herself in the attic. Mother and son were buried together.
Several days later, the spirit of the son was called.
The medium’s hand begins writing...
MediumAre you aware that your mother killed herself in despair after losing you?
Benjamin C.Yes.
Benjamin C.And if it weren't for the grief her fatal act has caused me, I would be completely happy.
Benjamin C.My poor dear mother...
Benjamin C.She couldn't bear this temporary separation.
Benjamin C.Hoping to be reunited with the son she loved so dearly, she took the path that now keeps her far from him.
Benjamin C.And alas...
Benjamin C.For a very, very long time.
Benjamin C.She has delayed, for an unknown length of time, the reunion that would soon have happened if her soul had accepted God's plan, and if she had humbly accepted the trial she had to go through, with the repentance and purification that would have cleansed her.
Benjamin C.Pray for her.
Benjamin C.Oh, pray for her.
Benjamin C.And you mothers who are moved by the sad story of her death...
Benjamin C.Take care not to imitate her fault.
Benjamin C.Do not imagine that her love for the son who was her joy and pride was greater than other mothers' love.
Benjamin C.No.
Benjamin C.It wasn't that she loved more than others.
Benjamin C.She lacked courage and acceptance.
Benjamin C.Mothers...
Benjamin C.When you see your children's eyes close in death, remember that, like Christ, they have climbed their Calvary, and from there they will rise into the glory of the higher life.
The mother was then called.
The medium’s hand begins writing...
Benjamin's MotherI have to see my son!
Benjamin's MotherDo you have the power to give him back to me?
Benjamin's MotherHow cruel they are!
Benjamin's MotherThey took him from me and carried him off into the light.
Benjamin's MotherAnd they left me in darkness.
Benjamin's MotherI must have him.
Benjamin's MotherI will have him.
Benjamin's MotherHe belongs to me!
Benjamin's MotherIs a mother's love nothing?
Benjamin's MotherWhat!
Benjamin's MotherI carried him in me for nine months.
Benjamin's MotherI fed him with my milk.
Benjamin's MotherI built up his flesh with my flesh, his blood with my blood.
Benjamin's MotherI guided his first steps.
Benjamin's MotherI taught him to say the holy name of God and the sweet name of mother.
Benjamin's MotherI made him a man, full of activity, intelligence, honesty, uprightness, and love for his parents.
Benjamin's MotherAnd now I lose him just when he was starting to fulfill all the hopes we had placed in him, just when a bright future was opening up before him?
Benjamin's MotherNo.
Benjamin's MotherGod is not just.
Benjamin's MotherHe is not the God of mothers.
Benjamin's MotherHe understands nothing of their despair and their grief.
Benjamin's MotherAnd when I killed myself so I wouldn't leave my child...
Benjamin's MotherThey took him from me a second time!
Benjamin's MotherMy son!
Benjamin's MotherMy son!
Benjamin's MotherWhere are you?
MediumPoor mother, we feel your sorrow.
MediumBut you chose the worst possible way to try to rejoin your son.
MediumSuicide is a crime in God's sight.
MediumAnd He punishes every violation of His laws.
MediumYour punishment is to be deprived of seeing your child.
Benjamin's MotherI thought God was more merciful than people.
Benjamin's MotherI did not believe in His Hell.
Benjamin's MotherI believed in the eternal reunion of souls who loved as we loved.
Benjamin's MotherI was mistaken.
Benjamin's MotherHe is not a just and good God.
Benjamin's MotherHe has not understood how immense my grief and my love are.
Benjamin's MotherAh...
Benjamin's MotherWho will give me back my son?
Benjamin's MotherHave I lost him forever?
Benjamin's MotherTake pity on me, O God!
MediumYou must try to be calmer.
MediumRemember this well.
MediumIf there's any way for you to see your child again, it isn't by blaspheming God the way you're doing now.
MediumInstead of drawing His pity toward you, you're bringing a harsher punishment on yourself.
Benjamin's MotherThey told me I would never see him again.
Benjamin's MotherI thought they were taking him away to Heaven.
Benjamin's MotherAm I then in Hell?
Benjamin's MotherThe Hell of mothers?
Benjamin's MotherIt exists.
Benjamin's MotherI see it only too clearly.
MediumYour son is not lost to you forever.
MediumBelieve me, you will see him again.
MediumBut you must deserve that grace by accepting the will of God.
MediumBy rebelling, you keep pushing that moment farther away.
MediumListen to me.
MediumGod is infinitely good, but He is also perfectly just.
MediumHe never punishes without a reason.
MediumIf He sent you a great sorrow on Earth, it was because you needed to go through that trial.
MediumYour son's death was a test of your acceptance.
MediumSadly, you failed it during your life.
MediumAnd now you are failing it again after death.
MediumIf you had accepted, without complaint and with humility, the trial of this temporary separation, and if you had patiently waited for the time when you too would leave Earth...
MediumYou would have seen your son at once when you entered the world where you are now.
MediumHe would have come to meet you with his arms open.
MediumAnd you would have had the joy of seeing him radiant with happiness at meeting you again after your time apart.
MediumWhat you did, and what you're still doing, puts a barrier between you and him.
MediumDo not imagine that he is far away somewhere in the depths of space.
MediumNo.
MediumHe is nearer to you than you think.
MediumBut an impossible veil hides him from you.
MediumHe sees you.
MediumHe still loves you.
MediumHe is grieved by the painful condition your lack of trust in God has brought upon you.
MediumWith all the force of his love, he longs for the happy moment when he'll be allowed to show himself to you.
MediumIt depends on you alone whether that moment comes sooner or later.
MediumRaise your heart to God, and repeat after me:
MediumForgive me, my God, for doubting Your justice and goodness.
MediumI understand that if I suffer, I must have deserved this trial.
MediumPlease accept my repentance and my submission to Your holy will.
Benjamin's MotherWhat a blessed gleam of hope you have brought into my soul.
Benjamin's MotherIt has lit up the night I was sunk in.
Benjamin's MotherThank you.
Benjamin's MotherI will continue to pray.
Benjamin's MotherFarewell.
Kardec explains that this mother did not go through the common suicide illusion of thinking she was still alive. She knew perfectly well that she had died. Her punishment was to know she had entered spirit life and still be unable to find the son she had hoped to rejoin. He concludes that punishments are not the same for everyone. Each spirit suffers in the particular way tied to the fault.